[Coulson is also perfectly straight-faced the entire handshake. But then again, he's a cat. And cats are masters of the poker face.]

I find being professional helps soothe first meetings. [Yes, he's always that professional. Until he gets to know you better.

Oh cat puns. How original. There isn't even the twitch of a whisker.]

Considering all catastrophes I've been involved in, handling this calmly is simple enough.

At least no one is shooting at me, or trying to render me catatonic.

[Smirk.]